@mac Your second video has the BLTouch working correctly; at startup it does 2 self test deploy and retracts, then stays lit up in red. It is supposed to be powered from 5V. That's what the wiring table says to do.
If you look at the BLTouch documentation, you'll see the BLTouch can OUTPUT 5V, or can be set to OUTPUT 3.3V. On old Duet 2 boards, if you set it to output 5V, the input on the Duet can't cope with that voltage, so you have to set the BLTouch to output 3.3V. It's not relevant any more. It is explained in the Duet 2 section of the documentation. The Duet 3 section has the note that says it doesn't matter.
As for the motors and the screen, please post your config.g and homex.g files.
Ian